Ibn Maajah (1887) narrated that ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab said:
“Do not go to extremes with regard to the dowries of women, for if that were a sign of honour and dignity in this world or a sign of piety before Allaah, then Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) would have done that before you. But he did not give any of his wives, and none of his daughters were given, more than twelve uqiyah. A man may increase the dowry until he feels resentment against her and says, ‘You cost me everything I own, and caused me a great deal of hardship’.”
Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah, 1532.
“Do not go to extremes” means do not exaggerate in increasing the dowry. “A man may increase the dowry until he feels resentment against her” means, until he begins to hate her when he is still paying off the debts incurred because of this mahr because it is too hard for him, or whenever he thinks about the matter.
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
⏩ Writing the Marriage Contract is not a Condition for the Validity of the Marriage – Shaikh Salih al-Fawzan
Question : From the conditions of the marriage contract, is it necessary to have it written [i.e. Writing the contract]?
Answer : “No, writing [the marriage contract] is not from the conditions for the validity of the marriage. If there is the agreement of the Wali (the guardian) and the acceptance of the groom or from their Wakeels [i.e. Trustees], in the presence of two just witnesses, along with the removal of any preventatives from the two spouses, then the contract is valid even if it is not written. Yes”.
Employment is Not a Condition For Marriage – Shaikh Ahmad an-Najami
darussaafi Thu 16 Rabi Al Awwal 1438AH
Question: The questioner says: I am a young man who wants to propose to a young girl and she is from our tribe. However he father, may Allah preserve him, rejected that with the argument that I do not have employment and I do not have a specific amount of money going into the marriage. What do you advise me? May Allah reward you
Answer: “In reality, the people in this time have become attached to employment. It has become the most important thing to them. Provisions are upon Allah, the Exalted. This is especially so if you have the physical capability [to earn], a yearning for marriage, and your father is hastening to marry you off. That which I see is that it should not prevent you and perhaps you will find employment afterwards or some freelance work by which Allah will provide for you”
Faisal Ibn Abdul Qaadir Ibn Hassan
The sharing that is required has to do with spending the night. So you have to divide your time between them. The same applies to maintenance, accommodation and clothing. It is essential to be fair in these matters, by giving each of them sufficient accommodation, food, drink and clothing. You must also divide your time fairly among your wives. This is the justice that is enjoined by Allaah in the verse (interpretation of the meaning):
“…then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one …”
al-Muntaqa min Fataawa al-Shaykh al-Fawzaan (5/question no. 384)
I got married Alhamdullillah but before marriage I used to watch pornography whilst I was addicted to watching it now I fear I will return to that is it permissible for me to inform my wife so that she may help me in not watching it
Shaykh Abdul Ghani Al Umaree:
If you were to fear Allah how would you return to it, Allah has given you better in Halal and there is no need to inform your wife for indeed Allah has covered you, there is no need to inform her with this
Translated by Majid Jawed Al Afghanee
The best of you is the one who is best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives [Saheeh Targheeb no. 1925]
‘Allamah al-Mubaarkfoori rahimahullah said: “That is: his children and his relatives. It was said his wives and relatives” [Tuhfatul-Ahwadhi (10/269)]
Imam al-Munaawi rahimahullah said: “His children and relatives. This is what Ibn Atheer said” [Fayd al-Qadir (3/495)]
However, there is another wording of the same Hadith which states:
خيرُكم خيرُكم للنِّساءِ
The best of you is the best of you to your women
[Saheeh Targheeb no. 1925]
as-San’aani rahimahullah said:
“That is: his wives. It is a specific admonishment for doing good towards the wives in general, except they are more deserving of good companionship. It is also carried to mean the daughters, sisters, and their like” [Tanweer Sharh Jami as-Sagheer (6/33)]
Shaikh Ibn ul-‘Uthaymeen rahimahullah said that the intent of women in one Hadith is the family as comes in the other Hadith [See: Sharh Riyaadhus-Saliheen (3/569)]
So the Hadith is in regards to the wives and other than them of the family.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) was asked about a man who stayed away from his wife for a month or two months and did not have intercourse with her; was there any sin on him or not? Could the husband be asked to do that?
The husband is obliged to have intercourse with his wife on a reasonable basis, which is one of the most important rights that she has over him; it is more important than feeding her. It was said that what is obligatory with regard to intercourse is once every four months, or according to her need and his ability, just as he should feed her according to her need and his ability. And the latter is the more correct opinion.